Author Archive for Jimmy
Page 3 of 13
Last weekend, we took a break from wines to do beers. We chose stout, sometimes interchanged with porter. We had Irish, oatmeal, imperial and chocolate. No one was able to meet my request to find a milk stout or an oyster stout. Because it was a night of pretty much just frozen pizzas, mashed potatoes deep fried into smiley faces, a few tequila cocktails, Alien, and Walk Hard, we didn’t stick to our rigid whole-number-only rating system. Instead, we only remember that Trader Joe’s has an AMAZING double (or was it triple?) chocolate stout, and that Guinness in a can was the least favorite. But it was beer, so it was drinkable.
So I’m a little late with posting our review of red Zinfandel. About two weeks late.
Zinfandel is grown world-wide, but the vast majority of Zinfandel available in the US is from California. As a matter of fact, we were unable to find anything outside of California to taste. Also difficult to find was any bottle over $20. It pairs well with barbecue and spicy food, so I made Emeril’s vegetarian chili.
We had five bottles, and not one scored well. The more we drank, the more we realized that Zinfandel did not sit well with us. They reminded us of the Argentinean wine from the previous week. The tastes were all tar, petroleum, and dirty socks.
At least the chili was a hit.
Last night several of my friends got together for the first in a series of wine tastings that will span the next several weeks. Each week we focus on a particular type of wine. No, wait, let me work on my oenological terminology: each week we focus on a particular wine varietal. Each person brings one bottle. We try to coordinate so we get wines from different countries and for different prices.
Last night was merlot, a grape native to France, but grown virtually worldwide. We served it with fresh red sauce on linguini, with an assortment of French-seasoned olives and robusto cheese, stella gorgonzola, and brie. For dessert David made chocolate mousse with whipped cream, shaved dark chocolate, and orange zest.
Our least favorite was Trumpeter from Argentina, for $10, which was complex in a rotting chocolate sort of way. Coming in at nearly the same score was a $22 bottle of Château Marcadis from France which tasted as though it was aged in green wood barrels. Third place went to an $11 bottle from France called Red Bicyclette. While unremarkable, it would work well with a simple meal such as spaghetti. The light petroleum finish wasn’t enough for any of us to not consider this wine again considering its price class. In second place was Kendall-Jackson from California for $24. And first place goes to a 1997 Philippe Lorraine from California, $35. It was by far the most complex and interesting wine. Not that the taste was complex at any given point, but the taste always seemed to vary from sip to sip, with new flavors coming out throughout the glass.
Next week: Zinfandel.
As long as bands have disbanded, they have been getting back together. Often, they break up at the height of their popularity. Fleetwood Mac broke the chain and got back together many times. The Smashing Pumpkins had steady releases throughout the nineties. Their last album, Machina II/The Friends & Enemies of Modern Music, was released in 2000 as an MP3 download on Napster, which at the time was still “evil.” The MP3 release was intended as an eff-you to their label, Virgin. They just wanted to get done quickly so they could break up. But seven years later, they regrouped. Many reunions work out spectacularly. Others fail. But they usually get back together because their old albums are still listened to; they still have a fan base. That is why the news shocked me:
That’s right, New Kids On the Block has returned for a reunion album and tour. They didn’t break up. People just stopped buying their albums. In 1990. Five 38-year-old men in a boy band? I need to see this.
For your viewing pleasure: You Got It
- There are an alarming number of cars with missing windshield wipers. You never notice rogue wiper blades until you run over them with 2-inch wide tires.
- Everyone is concerned about me catching a cold or pneumonia if I bike in cold rain. Or in the cold. Or in the rain. I didn’t know people still believed that old wife’s tale. Especially since I work at a company that grows viruses.
- Some people, particularly suburbanites, would rather honk at me than slide over to the empty lane on their left.
I had perhaps the most disturbing dream: I dreamt that I sharted my pants. It wouldn’t have been so disturbing had I not immediately upon waking up had to make sure that it really was only a dream. I was safe.
The Subway Sandwich shop across the street from my home was one of the nicest ones I’ve ever seen: plasma television, gas fireplace, arm chairs, bistro tables. Which is all rather ironic seeing as how it is located in the crummy Travelodge.
Months ago, the Subway got robbed. At 11 on a Sunday morning. Â There are three churches directly across the street, so I’m sure there were plenty of people around. Then, a few weeks later, the Subway was robbed again. Â A Sunday morning again if I remember correctly.Recently the Subway installed what I can only assume is bullet-proof glass. However, the glass only protects the area behind the food. It stops several feet from the cash register. If the bullet proof glass is meant to protect the employees, it is probably actually doing the opposite. If an armed robber comes in, and the employees run behind the glassed-in area to hide, it is likely going to piss off the robber. If he is prone to violence, a single pane of bullet-proof glass is not going to stop him. Â Using the simple laws of physics, all he has to do is reach his gun around the side of the glass near the register.
Besides the stupid idea that it might stop a robbery, the glass also makes it nearly impossible for the employees to understand the customers’ orders. Customers have to yell, and the more customers there are, the more yelling there is. Â It doesn’t help that most of the employees seem to have a difficult time with English to begin with.
“What can I get for you?”
“Just a minute, I’m thinking.”
“Did you say chicken teriyaki?”
“No, I said just a minute, I’m thinking“
“Chicken teriyaki?”
“No, I haven’t made up my mind yet. I’m still trying to decide what I want.” A moment later, “OK, I’ll have a footlong chicken teriyaki on honey oat.”
“No, we have no more honey oat.”
“Ummm… OK, I’ll have it on whole wheat.
“She starts to put American cheese on, without asking.
“No, no American cheese. I want Provolone.”
“No cheese?”
“Yes, cheese. Provolone cheese. Take off the American cheese.”
“Do you want it toasted?”
“No.”
“Toasted?”
“Not toasted.”
“Toasted?”
“No, I do not want my sandwich toasted.”
“Okay, what do you want on it?”
“Lettuce.”
She puts lettuce on it.
“Tomato.” I point to the sliced tomatoes. She reaches for the second bin of lettuce.
“Lettuce?”
“Tomato. Olives. Green peppers.”
“Pepperoni?”
“No, I said Green peppers. Red pepper relish.”
“Red pepper relish? I don’t know what that is.”
I point to the red pepper relish. “Oh, you mean red pepper sauce!”
Uuuuaaaaggghh!!!
If you haven’t seen Improv Everywhere yet, you really need to check them out. David just sent me a link to this one.
[youtube dkYZ6rbPU2M nolink]
I find it kind of odd that the biggest spectator reactions in this video are from black people. They kind of looked disgusted. Maybe it has something to do with this.
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